New Trump Version of the Bible

Donald Trump Jr. would like to suggest an edit. To the Bible.

Speaking on Sunday (Dec. 19) at a conference in Arizona he claimed that while liberals are “playing hardball,” conservatives stay nice and are just “playing tee-ball” (though just because Junior still needs the tee doesn’t mean others haven’t figured out how to throw some spin). Thus, he urged the crowd of activists at the event sponsored by Turning Point USA, a conservative political group created by Charlie Kirk, to “band together” and fight back against an alleged “cancel culture.”

To accomplish this, however, they’ll have to put aside (ahem, cancel) some teachings of Jesus.